talking to friends

 Materials:

 Introduction

Many children lack the very basic social skills of how to talk to someone or how to respond when someone talks to them. These skills then need to be taught. Remember, we think nothing of teaching children how to count, say their letters, or spell their name, but we often don't take the time, or don't think we should have to, teach them basic social skills.

  Objective/Purpose

The child will learn how to initiate and respond to another.

 Procedure:

1. Ask children if they have ever wanted to talk to someone or did not know how or whether they have ever said hello to someone before but that person did not look up and did not respond. Allow for discussion. Ask questions about how they felt and how they handled the situation.

2. Then tell children that today they are going to learn how to talk to someone and how to respond when someone talks to them.

3. The first thing to do when talking to someone or when someone talks to you is to look at them. Have the children practice taking turns calling each other's name and looking at each other.

4. Next, have children practice asking each other basic questions such as what their favorite food is, or what their favorite television program is. Have the other children respond.

5. Back in the group, ask why it is important to make eye contact and to respond to someone who talks to us (e.g., it makes us feel good, it is good manners, it is polite, people will like us, we can make friends this way, we can get to know someone better).

6. Remind children that throughout the day, they should make sure when someone talks to them or they talk to someone else that they should first make eye contact. Also remind them that when someone speaks to them, they should respond with an answer even if the answer is 'I don't know.'

7. Check back with children at the end of the day to relate their experiences.

  Practice & Extended Activities:

Some cultures do not encourage eye contact and students from these cultures should not be forced to make eye contact. In addition, it is often difficult for a child with Autism, Asperger's, or Pervasive Developmental Disorder to make eye contact AND think of what they need to say. Use caution and know your child.

Children who have been abused and/or neglected often have difficulty making eye contact and should be encouraged to do so. Eye contact practice can be made fun, such as holding up flash cards for the child to name but putting the card directly in front of your eyes. Another fun way is to make a game out of calling the child's name, having the child look up and rewarding the child with a mini M&M.

Children who have difficulty responding to questions asked of them may need verbal cues, such as "Are you done playing with the blocks? Yes or No? Children may also have to be taught to use 'I don't know' when they do not know the answer.

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I love tranquil solitude and such society as is quiet, wise and good.   - Percy Bysshe Shelley

02/14/2008