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Social Development of a 2-yr-old

Attention:
By the time an infant is between the ages of 18 months and three, the child begins to stay with difficult tasks, persisting and extending attention to try to figure out how to succeed, rather than experiencing frustration and just giving up. For example, a child might work several minutes to open a canister of blocks before going to an adult to ask for help.

Self-Regulation

During the middle to ones and early twos, the primary social task of the child is to test social limits, rules, and expectations. In fact, some experts suggest that the child spends approximately 90% of his/her wakeful moments testing those around him. This time period is commonly called the terrible twos, but the temper tantrums, constant "nos" and seemingly endless opposition from the child are necessary for social development.

It is through this testing that the child learns what is acceptable behavior and what is not, that is why it is so important for an adult caregiver to set consistent limits and be firm in not wavering or giving in to the demands of the child. Although this time period can be frustrating, especially when standing in line a K-Mart or the grocery store, a caregiver should remember that all children go through this stage if they are to reach maturity -- and, that these times will soon pass!

Sometime between the age of 2 and 3, the child begins to understand and internalize the limits learned during the previous six months, accepting routines and behavioral limits. The child can also begin to follow directions given by an adult in relation to these limits (e.g., "Stay here." "Remember to walk.").

  About the Author: Dr. Catherine Swanson Cain, PhD, LMFT provides counseling and therapy to families of young children with behavior problems or mental health disabilities. She also provides consultation and training to educators, child care providers, and professionals on a variety of behavioral health issues.